But what if I don’t want to be one? What if I don’t want to join you in your fantasy bubble? What if I’ve tried Christianity and found it incredibly disappointing? You’ll tell me no doubt that was my fault because I wasn’t part of the right church or didn’t have the indwelling Holy Spirit or didn’t have a proper relationship with Jesus. And you’d probably be right, given the Holy Sprite and Bejabus are figments of the imagination. Which is why I’m no longer a Christian, and why I will not be recruited to your cause ever again.

Why do Christians think they have to recruit anyway? They’ll give you all sorts of reasons from ‘the great commission’ of Matthew 28:18-20, to wanting to save your soul from an eternity of hell. I’m not convinced these are the real reasons. i think they want to convert you because they’re insecure. ‘Look’, they’re saying, ‘I’m part of this ridiculous movement and I feel quite insecure about it. I’m not sure it’s for real and I need you to join me to make me feel I’ve made the right choice.’

It’s the same with all the fringe groups that exist in Western society today. From Veganism to Just Stop Oil, Trans-activism to groups that want to rehabilitate the urban rat (I kid you not), I’m really quite happy for those who want to give up meat, stop using oil, identify as whatever they like and embrace rodents they think have had a bad press. But such people cannot and should not expect me, and society at large, to do the same.

I’m not convinced. Having reviewed the available evidence (in the shower) I find that I don’t want to give up what little meat I eat. The human body has evolved to eat, and indeed to need, meat. Plus, the vegans I know are among the unhealthiest people on the planet.

Immature Just Stop Oilers haven’t given up oil themselves of course. They publish their hysterical nonsense on devices made of plastic made of oil. They still travel to art galleries to vandalise beautiful works of art in modes of transport that require oil in some form. They promote electric cars and wind turbines, both of which require oil in their construction and operation. Just Stop Oilers have yet to show how ceasing to use oil with immediate effect is going to save us and the environment, rather than just taking us back to the living standards of the 17th century. So, no, I won’t be joining or supporting their cause and will not, because as things stand is impossible to do so, give up using what little oil I do use.

Nor will I be joining the Trans-movement or campaigning on behalf of it. Nor will I be cancelling those who raise objections. I’ve no problem with those who genuinely feel they are the opposite sex and quietly get on with doing something about it. But I cannot and will not accommodate aggressive testosterone-driven men in women’s clothing who are hell bent on usurping women’s rights. That is not what Trans is about.

As for the urban rat… are these people serious? They insist rats are not vermin even though they’re known to carry 35 diseases that are dangerous to humans, many fatal. Try asking those who think they’re lovely and cuddly whether they’d be happy eating in a restaurant with a rat infestation in its kitchens. Ask them if they’d like a colony hunkering down in their spare room. I wouldn’t, so I won’t be signing up to welcome the urban rat into my life any time soon.

And so it is with God. Please don’t waste your time telling me how lovely and cuddly he is. Don’t tell me how much he loves me and wants me to identify as one of his own. Don’t tell me I should give up living the life I live and love, so that I can be with him forever. As with all the causes that humans are prone to inventing, the evidence simply isn’t there. Leave me be and keep your insecurities to yourself.